I am a planner and a worrier. I'm an only child with a nearly perfect husband and four active children. I'm a social worker trying to help one person at a time. I'm a Young Women President who loves her calling and the people she serves. I'm a daughter of God. I often feel alone. I worry about my kids and their actions and words. I worry about their future. I'm sad life goes so fast. I don't remember a lot of things, yet I remember the important things. I love to sleep. I love Diet Coke with a shot of Root Beer. I'm a daughter and sister in law. I have no parents living on Earth. I have a great deal of extended family. If you move away, you generally become a Christmas card friend. I have anxiety at times when I have to go somewhere like a gathering with friends. I battle depression with medication and my thoughts. I believe in therapy/counseling. I know that Jesus Christ lives and is my older brother and redeemer. I believe in prayer. When I'm alone for too long, I get really sad and angry inside. I want my children to gain testimonies of Jesus Christ and His teachings. I want my children to know how much I love them. I want to be the best mom. I feel like I fall short every day. I want to say the right things to people in the right way. I want to make a positive difference in life. I want to laugh and sometimes I want to cry. I enjoy reading easy books. I love red licorice and cinnamon bears. I eat raw bread dough and raw cookie dough and they make me happy. I love Travis more than anyone will ever understand. I'm grateful for him every day. I don't know how I could make it through without him. I want to be an example to my kids. I want them to call me all the time when they are adults. I want to remain in their lives. I don't want to suffer through aging. Sometimes I yell. More times, I talk loud and sound frustrated. I want to be able to ignore others anger and not get riled up. I don't like to exercise unless it's a good class that doesn't kill me. I do like to walk with the dog. I love to snuggle with the dog more. I love watching some funny TV, mostly with Travis. An occasional movie is fun. I love shoes and could but don't buy them all the time. I miss my mom almost every day. Sometimes I feel too much of others pain and affliction. I love a clean house but don't love cleaning it. I hate cooking and the grocery store. I love being involved in things that I want to be involved in. I love driving my kids to activities. I love watching the boys play soccer. I love watching Kedzie do whatever she's doing at the time. I want to do more in my calling. I get frustrated with stupid people. I want my kids to know who I am before it's too late. I struggle knowing who they really are even though I know them the best because they are constantly evolving. It's hard to not have siblings or immediate family. I'm doing my best every day.
I don't know why I felt that I needed to write all of the above, but I did. Maybe it's for my kids and their future reading of this blog. That's probably it.
Kedzie, you are amazing. You are sensitive and kind. You feel for others. You have done such incredible work in school this year. You have been persistent and you've listened to the advice of others. Therefore, you are succeeding. I'm so proud of you and who you are becoming. You are physically and spiritually beautiful. I love watching your testimony of Jesus Christ grow.
Ethan, you are intelligent and sensitive. You are a jock who cares about others. What a wonderful trait to hold. It's been an answer to prayers to watch you receive the priesthood this year, to pass the sacrament and to go to the Temple. I'm grateful for the choices that you make for yourself. I'm so sad that you have to battle depression, but it is a battle that you can and are winning.
Triston, what an amazing individual you are. You never give up. You see something you want and you work for it. You manage your life so well. You are smart and you work hard to be the person you are becoming. It's so fun to watch you. I love it when you figure something out and it no longer confuses you. You are a spiritually strong individual who blesses so many lives with your smile and personality. You are silly and know how to make people laugh.
Alex, you are the best caboose to our family. You are keeping up with your brothers and sister in remarkable ways. You are blessed with so many talents and you use those talents. You aren't hiding them. You are strengthening them every day. I know it's hard to do things that you are know are right. I know that it's a battle to choose the right but you do, most of the time, and that is such a great quality. You are a faithful friend and brother.
Travis, you complete me! You are the reason life is worth living. You bring me joy and strength that no others could possibly attempt. You are there for me. You don't quit on me when I get a little crazy, you are strong spiritually and emotionally. You help me make it through the daily grind. Thank you. I love you so much and I'm grateful to be with your for eternity.
I have so many blessings, I try to remember some each day so that I can show gratitude. My life is tough, as is every one's but it is my life. I'm meant to experience the trials that I've been given. My children were selected for me. They were given to Travis and I because we are the ideal parents for them. I'm grateful for the huge responsibility I've been given.
Love to all, Emily
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